I don’t do choreography.

by , under personal, Pirate

With it being the week leading up to Easter, I’ve been listening to Jesus Christ Superstar on repeat. It’s been a tradition of mine since 1993- back when I was in a community theater production of Superstar as an “Apostle Child.”

It was an oddly religious experience. We all worked together on the set, the costumes were made out of scraps (I had a horrible wig- the first of many). Our Jesus was a carpenter (he built and stained his own cross, and almost passed out from exhaustion doing it) and our Judas was a banker. Oh, and our director had at one time gone to seminary.

At any rate, it was a good experience for me- and it was the first of many shows I did.

In high school, I was cast in “Bye, Bye Birdie” as “Sad Girl #2.” Which is a dancing role, in “Put on a Happy Face.” And I can assure you I was baffled. Because I don’t do choreography.

But the woman doing the choreography had put together a string of 1960’s dances to “My Sharona” for the dance part of the auditions. And let me tell you, I’ve been doing those since I was a kid, so I did really well. But I made sure to tell her that I stank at actual choreography- that I have flaily arms unless I’m doing the Twist, the Swim, the Pony, et all. She didn’t believe me.

So I wound up with a dance part, flailing my arms the entire time.

Weirdly, two years later when they did Oklahoma, I was cast in ANOTHER dance part- one of the two little girls that follow Will Parker around. But the girl who did the choreography took pity and knew my limitations and gave me something I could do.

Now you know, people. I don’t do choreography.